Stanley Pines (
charlastan) wrote2024-09-09 12:18 am
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STICKS AND BONES INBOX

"Hi! You've reached Stan Pines' computer phone box thing or whatever. Leave me a message and maybe if I care enough about what you've got to say I'll actually get back to you. I probably don't, but hey! Test your luck! (Followed by obnoxious laughter until the BEEP)"
Text / Audio / Video / Etc
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[The mention of cookies makes him snort, but then he uh. Rubs the back of his neck.]
No, no, it isn’t. Trust me I had to have this conversation with one of them after accidentally offering cookies and then asking in a panic if it was cannibalism. Apparently edible cookies and sentient cookies are super different and they don’t think it’s weird.
[The more you know!! He shrugs.]
I still don’t bring them cookies though, because I weird about it. Which cookies did you meet?
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The creepy time one with the top hat. Short lady, heard you shouldn't run with scissors and decided to fly on a pair instead? That one. No idea what flavor time is supposed to be though.
[But now you've got him going so here's everyone he's met as of now, he's counting on his fingers.]
Plus there was the Star Person I cut in line, the guy that called me a vampire racist because I mentioned the garlic thing, and some guy that wanted to drink hot strawberry syrup for some reason. They weren't cookies though; they were just weirdos.
[NOT THAT HE DRANK STRAWBERRY SYRUP FIRST OR ANYTHING............]
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Timekeeper, yep. She's uh. She's pretty cool but like, also definitely nuts from being basically some kind of cookie time god. I like her, we talked about how crazy Trench was and she barely batted an eye.
[...He'll bring up the internship thing some other time, though.]
Let's see, star person has to be Loop. Vampire racist could be a few people, If it was aggressive, then Flamebringer, if it was like Grunkle Ford was lecturing you, then Gnosis. Not sure about the last guy.
[That could literally be anyone. Everyone here is a freak.]
If you meet Pure Vanilla Cookie, he's like- a Sheep Minotaur with a staff- he's teaching me magic right now, but he's let me crash at his house a bunch. Their whole household's good people.
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[Is it, Stan? Is it a good one? He doesn't elaborate beyond that for now, but if she gives him any reason not to trust her, Dipper's going to hear all about it.]
Vampire racist guy definitely sounded like Ford though, gave me a whole lecture on it and everything. And yeah, that was Loop! I'd say they're a real firecracker but there's probably a better space-themed thing I could go with. I dunno, I'll workshop it.
[Stan admittedly does make a face at someone being simultaneously a cookie and a sheep minotaur and being magical all at once, but once the surprise wears off he's over it. Stan's part squid anyway and can Pure Vanilla really be any weirder than the Time Cookie? Probably not.]
At least Vanilla's a real cookie flavor. And he put a roof over your head, so...I guess he's probably alright.
[Maybe he should keep doing bits about cookies and the various people he's met, but instead Stan takes a seat on the edge of his bed - mostly for lack of chairs.]
Sounds like you've met just about everybody around here, huh? Dug in your heels, made some friends...
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Gnosis. [The guys Ford Vibes are through the roof, honestly.] He has a sweet bug collection.
[Said like that wasn't the single most nerdiest thing he's ever said.]
He's genuinely so nice that I am actually worried about him.
[Something bad is going to happen to him because of how nice he is and then Dipper will commit war crimes.]
I- uh, well. It's a small town. Like, waaaay smaller than Deerington, or Gravity Falls, even. It'd be hard not to know anybody after a while, anyways. But ...yeah, I guess.
[He shrugs a little, trying not to look embarrassed.]
I've been managing okay.
[That's the biggest lie he's ever told.]
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Yeah? You've been holding up okay all on your own? With none of us here? Alone?
[He looks very, very skeptical. But then, he lets out a sigh and concedes a little.]
Well for what it's worth, it doesn't seem like you've been doing too bad surviving for the most part. Except for, y'know--
[He gestures at his own head where Dipper's feathers are starting to grow in. They both know what that is.]
But even with that...you're managing, and that's really something at your age.
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[The people around here being so welcoming and helpful did a lot to help him, but Dipper knows he's walking a very fine line between keeping that front in check and collapsing into pieces at any given moment. Having Stan kind of call him out does a lot to hit it home that he's just not going to be able to do that with him around. Not anymore.]
[He exhales, and comes to sit down on the bed next to him. He kind of just stares at his knees.]
It sucks, Grunkle Stan. I feel like I've been flying by the seat of my pants for months, like I can't relax. Everyone here has been so nice but what if I slip up? What if they run me out? What if they figure out I'm just some scared little kid who can't take care of anything-
[He reaches up to pull his hat off, some of the feathers flutter away with the motion. He runs his hands through his hair almost to try and pull them out.]
This happened almost two weeks ago...I can't get it to go away. Mabel's not here.
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He can't help it though - a snicker sneaks out of him when some of Dipper's worries creep up. He doesn't laugh at the top of his lungs or anything, but he does snort despite his best efforts not to.]
Why would they run you out? Literally everyone I've met here who knows you can't shut up about what a great kid you are! Y'know what's gonna happen if they find that out about you? They'll look out for you, 'cause they like you. Seriously, you're doing fine for yourself.
[Dipper's always a lot harder on himself than anyone else is going to be. Stan's know this about him since they were back in Gravity Falls. He twiddles his thumbs awkwardly]
But, y'know...I mean, you know I don't get all of it, but I get some of it. Sure, I never wound up in other dimensions or whatever, but...it's rough out there. Being away from your whole family.
[When you're a teenager, with no where else to go. Of course Dipper's flying by the seat of his pants! That's how you survive!
He watches carefully as Dipper removes his hat, but bats Dipper's hand away so he can take a better look instead, in case there's anything he could do about it himself. It feels a little like assessing the damage after a kid gets gum stuck in their hair.]
So what happened two weeks ago? It'd work better with your sister, but we can still prolly figure something out here eventually.
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[Dipper really is hard on himself, almost to a destructive degree sometimes, and being alone here really exacerbated that with these self-inflicted imaginary consequences for what he has always known to be his biggest weakness: sociability.]
[He lets Stan look his hair over while he chews on some of his words. He has wondered to himself if maybe Stan felt like this when he was at it alone. He kind of has a massive appreciation for it now, more than before. ]
I don't know how you did it for so long.
[He sighs and ...knows Stan is right. Not talking about it is going to keep making it worse and the fact that he hasn't really talked about it much is probably why its still here.]
I strained my powers doing some stuff I've never ...really done before. Or at least, have never done on command. It was a pretty dangerous ordeal and a lot of stuff happened. It's kind of a long story.
[But Stan is asking so he should just spill.]
One of the guardians that looks after this place, he's the gargoyle perched on the church roof, was looking for something he'd lost a long time ago and so we went as a group to give him some help. Here- it might be easier to just kind of show you.
[And then Dipper just does the thing that comes naturally, and pulls them both into the dreamscape. Since Stan has actually practiced this power of his with him, the transition is pretty smooth. They'll find themselves out in the forest with the rain pouring down around them. They won't actually be getting wet since this is just something from Dipper's memory, but it will feel like they're there.]
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Didn't really have a choice.
[He doesn't elaborate, but he doesn't need to. Dipper didn't have a choice either, after all.
Dipper talks and gets some of it out, and Stan finally takes his hands away. The scenery around them changes and while it does get a brief eyebrow raise from Stan, he lets it go since this doesn't seem to be straining Dipper any more than it usually does.]
Sure, why not? We'll go on a little mindscape field trip.
[He stands up and brushes himself off, getting up from wherever the memory put his bed and squinting for any sign of where the memory begins.]
So, what'd the guy lose anyway? A bet?
[Hopefully Dipper didn't think he was safe from Uncle Jokes just because they're in the mindscape. He's never safe from Uncle jokes.]
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Like old times, right?
[He manages a grin at that as he waits for Stan to get up and follow him.]
Man, I wish. He lost swords which would be super helpful in him killing stuff that threatens the grove. He was gonna do it all alone but someone found out and you know how that kind of thing goes.
[As they make it to the edge of the forest, Stan and Dipper will see the group surrounding Zahliya, the five-foot gargoyle as he explains their mission. Dipper doesn't spend a lot of time in this spot, just long enough to establish that the eight of them were going to go and they were going to head through the forest where it could be dangerous so everyone needed to stick close. Stan mind find interesting the bits where Dipper both proclaim "When have I ever left anything well enough alone." but also the part where Dipper shows Zahliya a drawing and when asked about it, explains that one of his uncles must have drawn it in the past.]
[The memory will shift once they all head into the forest, and Dipper lets the scene change again, to a clearing. Its sunny out, they're in front of a temple, and there are screams emanating from it.]
When we went in, something kind of weird happened and we got broken up into two groups and dropped in what felt like a Trench-style traumatic memory trial. You know the kind, where we have to figure out whats going on with a weird scenario or it won't let us go.
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He's quiet, but he's watching. A fond sort of pride stirs when Dipper speaks up, because he's never left a damn thing alone in his life, but his attention zeroes in on the discussion about the drawing. If they're close enough to see, he'll even try to take a peek at it - but if not, he'll want to see it later.
At first he thinks they'll follow the memory into the forest, but then the world shifts and tilts, and Stan groans when he gets the explanation.]
Ugh, I hate the traumatic memory trials! [He huffs and crosses his arms.] We've been through enough already without magical crud dragging up every little thing!
[Good to know that they'll have to keep dealing with that! Great! He loves that for all of them!]
...Hm. Doesn't seem like you guys got tossed in one of your memories at least?
[Or at least, none of this looks familiar at a glance. He could be wrong, but he kind of hopes he's right and doesn't have to navigate whether that's something he forgot or something he wasn't there for.]
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[It's nice to complain like this with Stan. He really missed it. Despite the kind of awful thing they're about to see here in a second, Dipper's spirits are up a bit from where they were before.]
[In front of the temple, half the group appears. Dipper, Mamika, who Stan met earlier, Luca, and Siffrin. As the screaming echos from the temple, their Gargoyle friend comes out ready to bolt into the woods. They immediately get into a confrontation with him.]
Nah, It was one of Zahliya's. [He gestures to the gargoyle.] We find out later that someone was actively tampering with his memories and with us getting dropped in them like this, it managed to knock something loose.
Where we are is ...the temple that used to keep the angry forest jerk sealed up. This is right after he's been set free. The ...screaming from the inside is from the caravan of merchant adventurers that wanted what they thought was treasure but...
[He frowns as the screaming dies off, but then he looks at Stan kind of pointedly. Have you caught on, why Dipper might have been worried about all this yet, Stan??? Meanwhile, on the outside the confrontation with Zahliya has heated up. Memory Dipper is being actively threatened by the gargoyle while blood is running from his right eye and his nose, there's an intense stalemate while ...Siffrin straight up tries to steal the swords of Zahliya right there. This turns into a chaotic fight.]
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He's also not thrilled that Mamika is there! But, you know. Whatever happened, she still turned up to turn him into a puddle over stickers on his first day, so. She's probably okay.
That merchant adventurers bit is pretty pointed though, and Stan bristles. He gets the implication immediately, but that doesn't mean he's emotionally prepared to talk it out in the middle of all this.]
Pfft. Those could be anybody's merchant adventurer Grunkles in there!
[It's probably not him! He assumes! But now the thought is in his head and he sure doesn't like it.
The fight gets pretty wild after that. A guy Stan can only describe as an unusually tall gnome makes a play for the sword immediately, and it all sorta goes to hell in a handbasket from there. He did manage to heal Dipper first though, he doesn't miss that bit. Unfortunately the "let's talk it out" folks and the "let's fight a gargoyle for his swords" folks weren't on the same page.
Suddenly though there's vines and laughter, but more importantly there's Dipper taking control of the situation and trying to trick their way out of the situation. Stan's grinning wide.]
The vines are you too, right? I think? You're really selling it out there!
[He shoves Dipper's shoulder - he's so proud! Look at this kid!]
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[As the fight plays out, Dipper watches just as intently. Seeing it play back like this means he's looking for spots where he could have done better- acted faster. If he had thought maybe to make a line for the temple first maybe-]
[Stan shoves him, and he snaps out of it. He ...honestly was not expecting to be praised, so he flusters a bit. Stan praise is particularly hard won sometimes.]
Yeah, yeah, that was all me. It was a huge gamble because i'd never tried to pull off the hallucinations on command before, but it actually worked.
[He grins.]
I just thought, alright, what would Grunkle Stan do? And did the opposite.
[He's joking, and it's clear he's joking from the shit-eating grin he's giving his uncle, but after a moment or two, he sobers up.]
[Memory Dipper is making his plea to Zahliya about how his family might have gone to stop the caravan, so there's a chance they're in there. After some convincing Zahliya finally concedes and they head towards the temple. Real Dipper heads towards the steps but he pauses.]
What's inside isn't pretty, I know we've seen worse than this from Deerington, but I just ...wanted to warn you.
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...and it shakes out pretty well! But the real Dipper isn't celebrating, and seems more cautious.]
Dipper, don't worry about me. Whatever's in there, I've definitely seen worse.
[They've had some moments across Deerington and Trench that make him wonder what Dipper could be able to show him, if he thinks it might actually rattle him. The important part though is that they clearly rattled Dipper, so Stan keeps close behind him as they enter.]
Cw: death, gore, dismemberment etc
[They cross the threshold and try as Dipper might, that memory of the scent still hits him, and probably Stan, too.]
[The carnage of the caravan stuck with him, and so it’s vividly laid out before them. Bodies strung about and torn apart with the cruelty of a vengeful god. While their party reacts in various ways with Mamika pointedly staying outside, Memory Dipper moves with a purpose, and begins to check every single corpse as if looking for something. He doesn’t stop until he’s done and then goes to help the others with the two remaining “alive.”]
It was weird, because I think this was the first time I’ve smelled blood since Trench. I dunno why that jumped out at me so much, looking back on it.
[His voice is a lot softer now as he watches it play out.]
Cw: death, gore, dismemberment etc
The scent hits him hard, but after Dipper explains he isn't surprised. Of course it hit him hard - because it hit Dipper hard and this is his memory. He glances around at the bodies, and up to the ceiling at the once that's on display up there. Dipper's words pull him back to the moment though and he steels himself with a breath.]
Probably, you know...because it's an overwhelming blood smell from a bunch of corpses?
[Stan shrugs. Blunt, but true!]
We all got used to it 'cause it was everywhere, but I'm pretty sure it's more normal for it to feel like this.
[For it to feel horrific and disgusting and overwhelming in large quantities, that is. He's tripping over his words a little, but he's trying to emphasize that there's nothing wrong with having it rattle him this way, but the best he can do is place a hand on Dipper's shoulder.
There's some debate over what to do about the two that are still alive - barely. Someone Stan doesn't recognize tries to do something to the bodies with fire, and that catches his attention even though everyone else is sure it's a bad plan. And yeah, it probably is given how much fire hurts people who can feel it, but Stan's never even made the connection it could help with wound care before.
...But then again, everyone's talking about how the gnome guy can use healing magic, and Dipper's learning healing magic, so maybe it's not something he'll ever need to do.
The fire guy leaves shortly after, leaving Dipper and the gnome alone with the withering bodies.]
Cw: death, gore, dismemberment etc
[Regardless of where they might be standing, this conversation plays out loud and clear. Another tell that it's something Dipper has hung onto out of all of this. Dipper proposes they do something "kinder" for them after a tense silence. Siffrin reacts ...probably like any sane person might.]
[The conversation will tell Stan quite a lot. One, that Dipper says he's sixteen in two weeks, so that's a fun tidbit he might not have put together yet, but more importantly, Dipper tries to impress upon Siffrin that he's capable of handling the deed, and that he shouldn't worry because of how fucked up he already is.]
[Siffrin calls this out like a proper adult and when Dipper kind of realizes his own words, it hits him like a truck. They stale mate with the ultimatum Sif offers, but then Dipper ultimately decides to make the choice. He gets up and walks out. The scene here pauses for a few reasons. Mostly, because Memory Dipper going outside means he doesn't know what happens next beyond what he can assume. He never watched Siffrin do the deed, but also it seems like.]
[Like maybe Dipper isn't quite ready to move on yet. He's staring forward with his fists tightly clenched and he is trying so hard to hold back tears that he's shaking.]
Cw: death, gore, dismemberment etc
He's not glad about the rest, but it's painful and necessary. Dipper's given him a good look at a baseline for how he's been recently, probably by accident, and it will help him fix the corruption issues - even if he can't do it as fast as Mabel could.
He opens his mouth and shuts it, trying to find words. He should drag Dipper off, physically pull him away from all this, but...things are stopped right now. Maybe they need to stay stopped, for a moment. The least he can do though, is turn Dipper a little so he's looking at him and not the graphic scene frozen in front of them.]
...So, uh. Did I ever tell you what happened when I saw Cynthia, back in the dream?
[He didn't, actually. He can confidently say he didn't. He never brought up his choices, never asked the kids what theirs were. Sometimes it came up and he'd chime in with what he'd done when their choices matched up, but there were two he never spoke about - Cynthia and Sodder. He did the thing he always does where he talks just enough about something that no one realizes there are pieces he isn't sharing until the moment is long gone.
Fortunately, it isn't a long story. Stan takes a deep breath, rips the band aid off, and lets the truth linger in the air--]
--I didn't do it. I couldn't do it.
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[So rationally, this is what should happen, it just hurts and Dipper wants to swallow it all down until it goes away, but he can't.]
[Seeing it the second time somehow makes it hit harder and that might be why he's threatening to fall apart. There's so much eating at him that he didn't even realize. He's afraid of becoming desensitized to horror, he's afraid he'll turn into someone he can't recognize, he's afraid of not keeping his shit together will make people look down on him, he's afraid of being left behind, he's afraid of disappointing Stan, and he's-]
[Stan suddenly has them face-to-face and that admission takes the air out of his lungs all over again.]
[It's true ...he never did find out what Stan did. He knew that Ford had done it, but somehow...]
...I did.
[He escapes him, barely. His voice making it clear he's still trying to hold it back.]
And I think about her every time I close my eyes- Grunkle Stan, I don't want to do this again.
cw: suicidal ideation from an NPC
You won't have to. Nobody's asking you to. Heck, that guy-- [Jerks a thumb behind him toward Siffrin's frozen form.] --kicked you out of here so you wouldn't!
[As tends to happen with Dipper-brand corruption, this is pressure he's putting on himself to some degree. That doesn't mean Stan didn't have some hand in it though, long distance.]
I...I dunno. She was miserable, and I've been miserable before, but. It was the difference between killing her and letting her wake up, and I thought...maybe she'd get a second chance waking up that she couldn't see. A chance to start over, y'know? Maybe she just needed to sleep until she woke up with the rest of us and could get up again.
[It's a side of Stan that he doesn't reveal as often - the side that holds the tiniest bit of Mabel-like optimism.]
But then, y'know. People were talking about what they did and a lot of people did what you did, Dipper. I know Ford did. So...I kept my mouth shut about it and let everyone think what they wanted about me.
[Everyone seemed to think killing her was the right way to go, so Stan didn't need anyone acting like he wasn't able to make these calls, just because he's a bleeding heart who said no when a woman begged for death. So he kept his mouth shut about his choices unless they were popular ones.]
Anyway, uh... [Stan sighs, feeling like he's losing the point here.] ...I guess what I mean is. Maybe if I'd said something back when it happened, you wouldn't think you had to jump to it as the only choice. Or feel like you had to be the one to do it, or whatever. ...Because, you don't.
cw: suicidal ideation from an NPC
[Hearing Stan admit the reason he couldn't do it- of course he couldn't, because Stan was that kind of person, wasn't he? That maybe he'd related to her more than anyone else in their family. It makes sense having it spelled out like that. Maybe he could have heard it sooner, but he's happy to hear it now, and it's startling just how big that feels.]
[It's okay for him to walk away from that choice. That fear he has of the choice becoming too easy for him, that he'll lose the weight of having to make that choice, doesn't have to come to pass because it simply shouldn't be his responsibility to begin with. It's okay.]
[A feather slips from his hair ...and then another. Dipper feels a storm of emotions that feels so much bigger than he is suddenly, grief for something he's been holding onto for years. He just simply can't hold it together any longer, and he finds he just doesn't want to anyway. It's just the two of them here. ]
[He chokes out the sob finally, something ugly and loud, while the upset tears just flow unbidden. Siffrin may have been the one to put the crack in the wall, but the dam is good as gone now.]
It wasn't fair-
[He says it between sobs, like a truth he's only just now uncovered.]
cw: suicidal ideation from an NPC
He's still not used to just saying things like that, and especially not in front of people who care about him. But...maybe what he's said already is enough here, for right now.
The dam bursts and Stan opens his arms and pulls Dipper into a tight hug, patting him on the back.]
Yeah. Yeah, I know. You shouldn't've had to.
[It's not fair and fucking life isn't fair, but it's so hard to watch someone he's basically been raising learn that lesson in real time. For decades Stan's been quick to point out that life sucks and it isn't fair and everyone's out for themselves, and he's probably even said as much to Dipper in more flippant moments.
Life isn't fair...but he desperately wishes it was for Dipper's sake. And maybe with time stopped they can act like it could be, for just a second.]
She was going through it, but y'know what? She shouldn't even asked you! That never should've been on you, period.
[Honestly the more he thinks about it, the more it pisses him off. What kind of self-respecting adult begs for a kid to put them out of their misery?]
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[Nothing was going to change the past, and he can't undo what he's already done. He isn't so sure if he would if given the option, because in spite of everything, it had been the right action to take, that he still believes, but ...]
[But for this moment, where it's just them and the world is frozen around him, he can grieve and be unhappy about the situation. He can be upset that he had to make the choice, and he can acknowledge how unfair it was, and that Stan is there to agree with him, and lay it out in front of him as a matter of course. It hadn't been fair, but life wasn't fair. That doesn't mean Dipper has to carry on like there's nothing he can do about it. He doesn't have to accept that he should just get used to it. All of this is proof that he doesn't want to become that sort of person, and that maybe he's still too young to even worry about that at all.]
[Stan's here now, so maybe he doesn't have to keep trying so hard to be an adult. He can put it off just a little bit longer.]
That's why...
[He pulls away, finally, voice hoarse and shaky.]
S'why I asked for PV to teach me healing magic. I didn't want this to happen again.
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